Marriage - Often Copied But Only The Original Does The Job

He [said], “Have you not read that the one who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” They said to him, “Why then did Moses command us to give a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her?” He said to them, “It was because you were so hard-hearted that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and marries another commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:4-9, NRSVCE)

The Pharisees, an ultra-religious group in Jesus' time, tried to trick him into making any blasphemous statement when asked on a weird case concerning marriage. But Jesus, the knowledgeable man he is, countered their trickery by showing them how weak human beings are and that this is why Moses gave us "loopholes" in the first place. 

Now, all the jokes and memes aside (for a second). In today's world, people get divorced over the silliest things. If the wife is not "obedient enough", whatever that is supposed to mean, or when the husband "loves his Nintendo Switch more than he loves me". Of course, marriages run into problems from time to time, just like any other relationship in business, or elsewhere. But marriage should not be something that we throw away as soon as it gets a little harder than expected. One of the many problems is that relationships in general have lost their original value in most western societies. Marriages are no longer seen as between men and women, but between non-specific partner 1 and non-specific partner 2. Also, if it does no longer work like it did during the honeymoon trip, people get divorced like if it is a broken computer that you return. 

Do not let loyalty and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. (Proverbs 3:3, NRSVCE)

Marriages are full-time jobs. There is no moment where you can rest from your responsibilities towards your spouse. But with the right principles, being focused on making the marriage work, it can and will get better. And often times, stronger relationships rise from those times of hardship, like a phoenix from the ashes.

Among young people especially, we can see a confusion concerning sexuality and gender. Is it because religion is on decline? Are we experiencing not enough problems, so that we have to create new ones? I seriously don't know. But the confusion is real, and social media often times magnifies those problems. But religion (as well as biology) could give them the simple but true answer: there are males and there are females. God told us that men and women have been created for that purpose, that they can become one flesh and multiply. Otherwise Adam and Eve would have been the first and last human beings, but if you are reading this right now, please know that there are at least four people now: Adam, Eve, you, and me. 

But there still is hope. If you or someone you know is going through rough times in their marriage, know that there is help. Struggling in a relationship is normal and nothing to be ashamed of. It is not a sign of weakness to search for help, but it shows indeed strength and determination. And alsways, let the architect of this holy union be part of the conversation; invite God to strengthen you, now and forever.

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